Thursday 21 August 2014

The Beautiful Fox

Years ago, as the woods first began to grow tall, a beautiful Fox walked through the trees. He knew he was beautiful because all the other animals would tell him as he walked past. The sun shone down upon his beautiful soft red fur, his big bushy red tail and his muzzle, which was as smooth and white as milk with a nose at the end as shiny and black as coal.

“Good morning Fox,” the animals would say as he walked past, “You do look magnificent today,” and he would smile and thank them for their kindness.

As the days went by Fox got so used to hearing their compliments that he began to forget to thank them for their kindness. In fact, after a while, he just expected everyone to tell him how beautiful he was.

He had changed.

Soon he would walk with his smooth muzzle and jet-black nose held high in the air just so he could look down on everyone else as they were not as magnificent as he.

He began to think that some of them were quite ugly, particularly the hedgehog with his ridiculous prickles all over him. Oh, and those stupid grey squirrels with tails longer than their bodies,’ he said to himself. ‘But worst of all was the deer with those two ugly short sticks growing out of his head.’

Now I don’t know if this was what caused the change but it was around this time that the weather in the wood began to get worse. The sun did not shine as much and a cold wind began to blow through the trees.

Many of the animals began to shelter from the cold wind but Fox would still go for a walk every day with his nose held high to show the other animals how beautiful he was.

The wind got stronger and stronger and colder and colder but Fox would still go on his walk but the animals no longer said how beautiful he looked. The wind was so fierce that it blew his soft red hair all over his body and his big bushy tail got tangled with leaves and twigs.

But worse still, the wind was so harsh that Fox’s nose began to stream with cold. His cold got so bad that he couldn’t stop sneezing. He really tried to stop because some of the animals were pointing and giggling at him.

He held his breath as hard as he could so he wouldn’t sneeze but a wind so cold and hard came through the woods and made him sneeze so loudly that, that, that ……… his beautiful black nose fell off.

‘Oh doh,” he shouted, ”My dose has fallen off!’

The animals came nearer to see and sure enough Fox’s nose lay frozen on the cold ground

‘My dose, my poor dose. How will I ever look beautiful again widout my lubbly black dose,’ said Fox and he let out a scream that sounded like a baby crying.

A young Deer walked forward. He knew what the Fox thought of him because he had seen it in his eyes but he cared little for what others thought and more about how one should behave.

He looked down at the little frozen black nose on the ground and then called up out the two Squirrels sitting in the tree above. ‘Can you come down and help,’ me he said, raising his voice above that of Fox who kept repeating, ‘My dose, my poor dose.’

The two Squirrels scampered down the tree chatting to each other as they leapt from branch to branch. When they came down to the ground the Deer asked them very politely if they might pick up Fox’s nose and wrap themselves around it.

The two Squirrels trusted the Deer and did as he said. The warmth of their bodies soon thawed the frozen nose until it lovely shine soon came back.

The Deer turned to the Hedgehog who standing nearby and asked him nicely if he might be able to spare some of his prickles. The Hedgehog trusted the Deer and did as he said. He shook his body so much that over twenty prickles fell from his coat.

‘My dose, my poor dose,’ said Fox as he watched the animals around him. The deer turned to the squirrels and said, ‘Now you two, take Fox’s nose and climb onto my head to the top of the two small twigs on my head. Hedgehog, if you could pick up the prickles you dropped and climb up and sit on the top of my head we can help Fox.’

So the animals did as Deer had asked and when they were in position he asked Fox to put his smooth muzzle between his antlers. As soon as his head was in position Deer asked the squirrels to hold his nose onto the tip of his muzzle.

Then he asked Hedgehog to use his prickles to pin the nose back on Fox. So Hedgehog pushed twenty prickles, ten each side through Fox’s muzzle and his shiny black nose was safely pinned back in place.

Fox looked at his nose, it was so strange to see it through the prickles and his muzzle was no longer smooth and white as milk as it was stained with mud and blood. He let his head droop to the ground, he could no longer look down on these other animals.

The deer thanked the Hedgehog and the two squirrels, who were so embarrassed to be thanked that they went from grey to red and stayed that colour. And the Deer found that his two short twigs grew into the most magnificent and beautiful antlers.

Fox had changed, he walked with his head hanging down and really only came out at night when the animals couldn’t stare at him and the whiskers on his face. Sometimes in the night, when he remembered how beautiful he had been, he would let out a scream that sounded like a baby crying.


And something had changed for Hedgehog too, but that’s another story.


Sunday 17 August 2014

The Threadbare Motley

He goes to the wardrobe and slides open the door
He looks for the suit he wears in public
That suit that hides him and all his flaws
The suit that masks and protects 
The suit that people recognise
The suit people expect
The suit that can keep questions unanswered 
The suit that allows him to hide in corners
The suit that can entertain
The suit that keeps people at a distance
A distance that means they cannot see how threadbare it has become
How the seams are splitting, the tears on the motley fabric
But it isn't there
The hanger casts a familiar shadow 
Against the back of the wardrobe
A beckoning silhouette 
Narnia's winter beckons inside
Tears sit an eyelash away
Ready to freeze and blind his sight 
He sees no hope of a giant lion
That will roar against the moonless night
And drive the clouds away with its wonderous breath
He steps inside and draws the door to
Outside a radio plays
Simon and Garfunkel
'Hello Darkness My Old Friend'. 

Tuesday 12 August 2014

To Lead Not Follow

He was determined to be different, determined to be the one who broke new ground, to lead not follow. Born from a family of failures he would stand out, he would be remembered, but for what? 

Then one day it came to him. Sitting in a working lunch he realised how much time was lost eating and swallowing. How much potential conversation and discussion was just eaten away by eating. That would be his breakthrough. If you could find a way to ingest food whilst still being able to talk he would have made the difference, he would have saved organisations billions in lost time and given people back more leisure opportunities.

He studied the physiology and anatomy of the body and realised it might be possible. If it was the Eustachian Tube would be the key.

On Tuesday the 12th August he was prepared to try it. He took his Ginsters from its wrapper and sat by the table. Lifting up his right hand he pushed the hair on the side of his head away and slowly shoved the pastry and its filling into his open orifice.

Oh yes they would remember him. He had broken the mould. He was ....... the 'pie in ear'.

Sunday 10 August 2014

Vlad

Vlad awoke from his slumber and an unnatural shiver of excitement wracked his body. Soon the super moon would fill the sky and he would leave his sanctuary to feed. The darkness of night was his friend and comforter, the daylight the stuff of nightmares.

As the moons beams cast the tortured shadows of tree branches across the fields he felt new life pulsing through him.

Down in the village the adults and children slept unaware of the darkness moving towards them. And they would remain asleep and safe for Vlad was a vampire slowworm and was unlikely to be even halfway to their homes when the sun came up.

Saturday 9 August 2014

Mary had a little lamb

Modern nursery rhymes

'Mary had a little lamb,
His fleece was white as snow,
Her father has an abattoir 
And struck a deadly blow

The lamb now scared and running
It's fleece as red as blood
Whilst Mary lies there bleeding
Next to where her father stood

Her Mother from the kitchen
Shouts, 'Mary is it you?'
And turns to see her husband
Her hopes dashed 'Oh it's you'

He walks toward her smiling
And pulls her to the door
She sees her bloody little lamb
As she falls down to the floor

The Father takes his shotgun
And climbs towards their bed
Then sitting on the padded edge
Let's a bullet find his head.

Mary had a little lamb
A family and farm
Who knew that supermarkets
Could 'negotiate' such harm