She stared at the blood on her hands and
thought calmly how they no longer looked like hers, she was detached from them.
She hadn’t done this, they had. At the same time a strong wave of nausea swept
over her as she realised that if someone as timid as her could do something
like this then her belief system was shattered. People could and will do things
they would normally find unspeakable.
In the world outside her head she could
hear the approaching sirens. Suddenly she wanted to know where her handbag was,
that everything was safe. She could just see it out of the corner of her eye.
She wanted to reach out to it but was frightened to mover her hands. She could
see blood still running between her fingers.
Behind her a calm voice was speaking. ‘All
right love, now this is what we are going to do. Don’t make any sharp moves and
don’t do a thing until we tell you. Is that clear?’
Her voice would not work so she nodded in
understanding.
She felt the presence of two people as they
knelt beside and behind her. Their fluorescent jackets bathed the scene with an
unnatural yellow light. A large hand covered hers and the gentle voice spoke
slowly, ‘OK, take your hands away……. now.’
As she did his hand replaced hers and the
person behind her wrapped a blanket around her shoulders and lifted her to her
feet. She could hear the uniformed woman speaking but her words were difficult
to focus on.
‘You’ve done very well, you’ve been very
brave. Not everyone would have done what you have done.’
Finally her vocal chords seem to recover.
‘Will he be alright, will he be OK? You see I hate blood, I really hate it,’
She looked down at her hands and found herself vomiting onto the pavement.
The paramedic led her to the ambulance as
another drew up accompanied by a Police car. ‘Let’s get you cleaned up,’ said
the kind voice, ‘I think you may well have saved his life.’
‘I just found him on the pavement,’ she
explained ‘But I hate blood,’ she said quietly to herself, ‘I really hate
blood.’
