Thursday 29 September 2016

The Lord Scroley Dictionary - Volume 4

'Pedimoriae' - meaning: wistfully remembering that Clarks shoes had a wooden device for measuring your feet 

'Incidirus' - meaning: the uncanny ability to foretell an impending paper cut 

'Malusvenatus' - meaning: realising just after the serve that it wasn't badminton you used to be good at 

'Circumstuffe' - meaning: the complete inability to insert a duvet into its cover without a fight 

'Lactinanis' - meaning: the moment you realise someone has finished the milk and you need tea 

'Dentisem' - meaning: the feeling after eating poppy seed bread as the gaps in your teeth are filled 

'Materitis' - meaning: to feel cold because someone else is not wearing enough clot' - the 

'Somniummeer' - panicked wake up from a dream before realising it's OK and you're not a meerkat


Tuesday 27 September 2016

The Lord Scroley Dictionary - Volume 3

'Somnictus' - meaning: to insist that you are right then wake in the middle of the night to realise you were wrong

'Textuminas' - meaning: the discovery of an ex-tissue throughout the freshly done clothes wash

'Ascendemtia' – to reach the top of the stairs without a clue why you went up

'Spatularum' – the cooking utensil in the cutlery draw that jams it meaning you have to trap your fingers to release it

'Vestimenout' – the nagging doubt as you leave the house that you are wearing the wrong clothes for where you are going


‘Fadenergum' - meaning: the state of nervousness when out created by a mobile phone battery falling to 10%

Monday 26 September 2016

The Lord Scroley Dictionary - Volume 2

As the Scrabble Dictionary releases its new words here are a few more

'Destituning' - meaning: to protect oneself from disappointment by imagining everything will always go wrong

'Motusdubium' - meaning: the sudden chilling doubt that you are on the right train as it pulls out

'Ostiumabominatio' - meaning: the realisation, too late, that it's not your toothbrush

'Cochleone' - meaning: the sadness caused by thinking a slug is a homeless snail

‘Saeplect’ - meaning – the smile of knowing you are the only one on the bus silently repeating the word ‘plectrum’ in your head

‘Gearmentia’ – meaning - suddenly forgetting where reverse gear is in a car you regularly drive

‘Alliumysterium’ – meaning – the jar right at the back of the fridge containing a single pickled onion in cloudy liquid that you never owned

‘Jamaisvu’ - meaning: strange & unsettling feeling you have never seen or experienced the moment before, opposite of déjà vu


'Cunicupedibus' - meaning: the awkward pain and embarrassment of pushing both feet down a single trouser leg


Sunday 25 September 2016

The Tiny Seed

The garden was lovely, perhaps the most beautiful it had ever been. Years of toil were paying dividends and things were growing in previously barren areas. The result of all this work was a sense of happiness, of achievement, of well being. 

However one shadow still lurked. Despite the years of digging, sieving, weeding out all that could cause a problem to this paradise one seed still hid. The one tiny seed that could undermine all that had been achieved. One tiny seed with the power to negate all the good. It was there and would sprout into life one day growing tall quickly. Its shadow would rob the bright colours of their vibrancy, shade the joy. One tiny seed - the seed of doubt.




Thursday 22 September 2016

The Lord Scroley Dictionary - Volume 1

'Handbarress' - meaning: when you return a wave to someone then see their friend standing behind you waving back at them

'Barbedqueue' - meaning: When you move from the slow queue only to watch it suddenly speed up as your new one freezes

'Shaveletting' - meaning: the irrational fear that all the pencil sharpeners you've ever lost are plotting against you

'Poultrification' - meaning: the look of a forgetful chicken staring disconsolately back to the other side of the road

'Corviglum' - meaning: To creep up to single magpies and tell them how sad you are feeling

'Ipsumobruent' - meaning: The belief that every bottle has a genie inside but nearly all have now drowned

'Picklemongering' - meaning: To create small models of famous battles & battlefields from chutney

'Basilistis' - meaning: the disquieting suspicion that the herbs in your garden are mimicking your voice

'Olecraneist' - meaning: the feeling you have when you suspect one of your elbows is planning a bank heist


‘Urinfall’  - meaning: the affect of running water on a pressured bladder some distance from a natural place of relief