The Demons came last night. I was
expecting them soon, they have been leaving little notes in my head. They are
the most unwelcome visitors. They trample over my hope and laugh at things I
feel any pride in. They ridicule any achievement I may feel and shrink it to
nothing. They invite my fears and my mistakes to they centre of the room and
make them do their party pieces. They applaud and cheer every memory that makes
me feel the less of myself. They loosen the valve on my self-esteem until in a
sudden gasping rush there is nothing left. They flood my thoughts with darkness
and doubt and I stumble around trying to find the switch that can bring any
light back to my brain - but it is not there. Sleep will not come easily and
when it does it is filled with their shadows as my nightmares.
Lying in the dark
wrapped in a duvet of doubt and self-loathing I can reach out and rest my hand
upon the person I love. They are asleep but just touching them is like having a
single strand of hope, a gossamer thread to help me through the maze the Demons
lay out. If she is next to me then maybe, just maybe, I am not as bad as I
think. I am lucky to have that person.
To those who who
currently don't have that person in your life I just wish and hope you find
your lighthouse to guide you through the emotional waves and confidence cutting
rocks to the safe harbour of daylight.
No comments:
Post a Comment